Monday, 11 December 2006
How To Make A Lady Out Of A Girl
The following is from a book called How to Rear Children by Dr Jack Hyles. The whole book can be found online at:
I don’t agree with all the sentiments expressed in the book, but I do think that a lot of what he says is excellent, and the rest is well worth thinking about. The portion I have included in this newsletter builds on the previous newsletter which mentioned that society, as it becomes more impure, is becoming more androgynous.
The women’s liberation notwithstanding, most men still want someone ladylike and feminine for a wife. To be sure, all good Christian men want submissive, feminine, ladylike and godly wives. Yet we live in a society which wants to homogenize the sexes. The boys wear make-up and the girls wear blue jeans. The boys wear flowered shirts while the girls wear work shirts. The fad is for the boys to be feminine and the girls to be masculine. Consequently, if parents rear a girl to be ladylike, they will be swimming upstream, going against the grain and climbing uphill, but it can be done. If it is done, however, it will be on purpose, and some of the following suggestions must be used in order to make a lady out of a girl.
1. Dress her like a girl. Let her have long hair. Let her wear lace and ribbons. Do not let her wear that which pertaineth to a man. Deuteronomy 22:5 says, "The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the Lord thy God." The parent who wants to make a young lady of a daughter should see to it that she does not wear revealing clothes, but that she dresses modestly. I Timothy 2:9 and 10 says, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety: not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works."
2. Teach her how to be graceful in sitting, walking, etc. Every mother who has a daughter should be careful to show her how to sit like a lady, walk like a lady and exhibit propriety and grace in her manners.
3. Teach her to be an intelligent listener and an articulate conversationalist. She should read a variety of good books and magazines and have a wide variety of knowledge. The wise lady will never "take over" the conversation. She will add just enough to make a valuable contribution and to show her intelligence on the subject. The wise mother will teach her daughter to be the kind of young lady who has a beautiful spirit and a beautiful soul, one who can communicate, one who is understanding and one who is quietly articulate in conversation.
4. Teach her to make her dad feel like a hero. A young lady that can treat her dad properly is more likely to treat her husband properly. If she makes her dad feel like a man when he is in her presence, she will no doubt make her husband feel like a man when he is in her presence. She will someday transfer this to her husband, and her husband will rise up and call her "blessed."
5. Teach her to have the proper heroines. The mother should be very careful to see to it that the daughter does not idolize Hollywood starlets, female athletes, etc., but rather, feminine, yet successful women like the Bible characters Hannah and Elisabeth and characters in history like Susannah Wesley and Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Also point out feminine ladies whose path is crossed by the daughter and lead her to emulate them. It is very important that the young lady, even the girl, admire the right kind of people.
6. Teach her to pull for her dad. The wise mother will teach the girl to make a hero of her father and always pull for him. She should pull for him in business and do all she can to help. She should pull for him in any athletic contest and do all she can to cheer him to victory. In everything he does, she should stand on the sidelines and root for her dad. She is being taught to root for the biggest man in her life and to cheer and spur him on to bigger heights. When she is married, she will transfer this to her husband and will be a great encouragement to him.
The mother must teach the daughter that when the father is a success, the daughter is also a success. She is a very vital part in his success, and as a member of the team she can share the victory and the spoils. When this attitude is properly developed, she will feel the same way when she is married. When the husband wins a victory, it will be a team victory rather than a victory just for him.
7. Teach her the sanctity of the body. She should care for her body. She should be well groomed and physically clean. Then she should also be moral and virtuous. Let her be conscious of the fact that her body is a very sacred thing and should always be treated as the temple of the Holy Spirit.
8. Let her be around feminine women. Teach her to associate with ladies who are feminine. Point them out to her when she is a little girl and tell her they are the ones she should copy and emulate. Let these ladies be those who dress like ladies, talk like ladies, walk with feminine grace, sit with feminine charm. Let these be ladies who are good mothers and who have poise, dedication, chastity, consecration and spirituality.
The most noble goal that parents can set for their daughters is to help them become Christians. The second most noble goal is to lead them to be ladies, for one of the great needs of our generation is Christian ladies.
The Lord has placed us here on earth at an exciting time. We have a wonderful opportunity to witness to Godly womanhood in an age where many women see womanhood as a curse. May we all be true Christian ladies in this generation of ours!
For the Greater Glory of God through our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ,